凯 Kai Vilmi

Guantanamo Bay Resort: Being packaged as the unique get-away-from-it-all adventure holiday experience for the busy Resustance fighter

Zabri Zain’s New Mesopotamia Times reports:

The idyllic Guantanamo Bay Beach Resort today launched an exciting promotional campaign aimed at the lucrative Middle East holiday market. According to its Guest Relations Officer, Staff Sergeant Abe Graib, the campaign is particularly aimed at “an emerging and fast-growing customer base” in Iraq.“We’re telling customers there — don’t just sit in your bullet-riddled minaret just dreaming of that perfect get-away-from-it-all holiday,” Graib said. “Waiting for you at our exclusive Guantanamo Bay Beach Resort is the ideal vacation experience of a lifetime! In fact, we promise you that you’re gonna stay there for a lifetime — if the Supreme Court, the UN, the International Red Cross and Amnesty International just leave us alone,” Graib added.

Read more…

This report is also available as a fun-filled brochure in PDF.

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In the best tradition of New Journalism, Ghaith Abdul-Ahad embeds himself to the anti-American fighters in Kerbala, Falluja and Sadr City. Get your keffiyehs, Kalashnikovs and RPGs ready for some “muj style” action.

Suddenly, there are some explosions, and three of them run towards the corner. We hear heavy machine-gun fire and I see American APCs firing at a building in the street.

“Where’s the machine gun?”

“I don’t know! You had it yesterday!”

“No, you had it!”

“No, no, it’s there with Ali.”

“Where’s Ali?”

“He went home.”

“So where is the machine gun?”

“With Ali.”

So they decide to fire RPGs without machine-gun cover. They hop into the street, fire off a grenade, and hop back. All the while we are squeezed behind the corner. All I can think is that I have to stay alive otherwise my girlfriend will kill me.

Now boarding to Kerbala, Falluja and Sadr City at The Guardian.

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